writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
