Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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