Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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