next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
