i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
