so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
He is an equal opportunity slut.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
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