How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
cat food counts as protein by the way
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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