i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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