i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
