so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
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