There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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