So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize