where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
