So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Randomize