Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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