I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
