What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
