So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
