Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
