Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
this hospital has no fireball
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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