I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
