that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
did i walk over a car last night?
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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