am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm bleeding and have questions
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
