I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I think my vagina is haunted
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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