If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
