She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
