I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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