Are we in a gay sports bar?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
