Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
