her vagine was all disorganized.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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