what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
