I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
