So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
It's blow job season.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
