Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
It's not a walk of shame if you run
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
