His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
