Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
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