Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
This toilet bowl is my home.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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