i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Dick very happy bro
Randomize