yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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