guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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