didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
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