He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Randomize
