my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
