His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
