Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
