it hurts more in the daytime
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
