it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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