I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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