I need help removing her.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
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