i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
