he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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